Mom Shaming

I never wanted to rant on the internet, but I feel that I need to address something.

Mom Shaming has to stop. It's one of the most disgusting things I'm currently witnessing on the internet, and that's with all the political posts going on.

Mothers need to support one another, not tear each other down. "But Janneke, I am just sharing articles that I believe in to show other moms there's another way!" No, let's be honest here. You're sharing that article because you either feel bad, guilty or unsure of a parenting choice you've made and you found validation in your choice and now feel the need to show others that your choice is, in fact, the right one. The problem is just that, we feel like we, as a parent, have a choice we have to make.

There's nursing your baby to sleep, then there's letting them cry it out. There's co-sleeping and then there's putting them in their own crib from the get go. There's breastfeeding and then there's formula. Staying home to raise your kids or going to work and make a living. It never stops. There always seem to be two sides to everything when there really should just be one side: Love you child and whatever you decide to do will be the right thing.

Let's all assume we are intelligent human beings that aren't out to intentionally hurt our offspring. There is no rule book, no right, no wrong when it comes to parenting. Whatever happened to going with your gut, to do something because you felt it was the right thing to do?

Guys, I've been there. I am STILL there. I read an article one evening about holding your child instead of doing the chores and immediately felt tremendously guilty for letting Zoe fuss and cry a bit more than usual that day. Another day, I held her while she napped and then felt guilty for not setting more boundaries. That doesn't even make sense. As a mom, we deep down know what our child needs, and we need to own it. What you decide to do in that moment is up to you, and we all need to accept that there are parents who will decide to do something different. And here comes the big point: THAT'S OK. If someone does something different than you, support them. Love them and raise them up. They're just trying to do the best they can.

Moms, let's stop the shaming! I know it's not always intentional, we just want validation, but it's killing us all. Being a new mom is already tough enough. We constantly question ourselves. We don't need the internet and each other to tear us down further. Love you child, whatever that may look like, and be proud of it.