I was just telling my mom this the other day. The first 3 months of parenthood sucked. Big time. They were hard, really hard, and while we never said it out loud, I'm sure we both thought the same thing: "what did we do?!"
Now, obviously those were during the worst of times and really, parenthood is never easy. But those first 3 months of Zoe's life, man, they were a really rough wake up call. I was hormonal beyond comprehension, Zoe had tummy troubles (they like to call it colic, if you're a new mom you'll read all about it) We were tired, she was tired, we were all miserable. We couldn't figure each other out.
It's hard now to think back to those times because they seriously are such a blur. I can hardly remember them because I was either so sleep deprived or so depressed that I was delusional.
There is no magic answer during the first 3 months. It's called the 4th Trimester for a reason. No amount of reading, googling or asking other parents will quite suffice. So why am I writing this? For the reason I'm writing all my motherhood posts: to tell you that you're not crazy, alone or a horrible parent because you can't get your screaming infant to just settle down. Every parent has been there, and if they say it was peachy from the get go, they're either lying or had a nanny.
So if you're reading this and are about to have a baby, or are in the middle of the 4th trimester and crying your eyes out, know that it will pass. At least for us, once Zoe turned 3 months it got better and once she turned 6 months, we finally felt like this is what we were meant to do all along.
Of course there's that whole 4 month sleep regression but that's a story in and of its own.